- Amy Dalwood-Fairbanks
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
Let’s talk about something that so many families are facing—yet not enough people are talking about: the overlap between neurodiversity and mental health.
When is it neurodiversity, and when is it mental health? Do they need to be separate? Can they be?
In my experience, as a parent and professional, these two areas are deeply connected. Yet, when it comes to accessing support through CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services), neurodivergent children are often falling through the cracks.
For many families, trying to get seen by CAMHS is almost impossible. You wait months, sometimes years, after being referred by your GP, your child’s school, or social services. But when you finally get to the top of the list, you’re told your child doesn't meet the criteria, because they're neurodivergent. “It's part of their autism,” they say. “It's just because they have ADHD.”
But here’s the thing. Just because a child is neurodivergent doesn’t mean they don’t also have mental health struggles. In fact, the two are often intertwined. Many autistic children and young people with ADHD struggle to find their place in a world that isn’t set up for them. They live in a constant state of overwhelm, exhaustion, and sensory overload, and this can take a huge toll on their mental health.
So why are we forcing a choice between the two?
We shouldn't be. We need to stop treating neurodivergence and mental health as two separate boxes, and instead take a more holistic view. Because the reality is, mental health difficulties often co-occur with neurodivergence. They’re not separate. And they shouldn't be treated as such.
This issue isn’t just theoretical. It’s personal. My daughter is autistic, with a PDA profile. She’s experienced autistic burnout, been unable to attend school, or even leave the house. During this already fragile time, she endured three significant traumatic events. She didn’t have the emotional capacity to process any of it. She was already in survival mode. And in the aftermath, her mental health collapsed—OCD symptoms, intrusive thoughts, and even hallucinations and hearing voices when at crisis point.
We had support in place—social services, family support, school—but CAMHS was the only option for actual mental health intervention. And every time we reached the top of the list, we were discharged without even being seen. The reason? “It’s just because she’s autistic.”
But that’s not true. Her OCD and trauma response weren’t simply “because she’s autistic.” Yes, her neurodivergence shaped how she processed what happened. But any child who went through what she experienced would be struggling. Her mental health difficulties are real and need support.
Unfortunately, her autism diagnosis has become a barrier to accessing mental health care, and she’s not alone. Thousands of neurodivergent children are being dismissed, ignored, or told their struggles don’t “fit the criteria.” And that’s not good enough.
This is a systemic issue that needs addressing at both professional and political levels. If we don’t act, we risk a generation of children growing up believing they’re not worthy of help. That their pain doesn’t matter. That they don’t deserve support because of how their brains work.
We must shift our approach.
CAMHS and other mental health services need to recognise that neurodivergence and mental health are not mutually exclusive. Mental health conditions are common in neurodivergent populations, and we need to stop treating them as separate. We need services that are trauma-informed, neuro-affirming, and willing to look at the whole child, not just the label.
This is also where alternative interventions can play a vital role. I’m passionate about the power of hypnotherapy to support neurodivergent children. It’s accessible, low-demand, non-invasive, and doesn’t rely on verbal processing like traditional talking therapies or CBT. For many neurodivergent children, especially those experiencing anxiety, burnout, or trauma, hypnotherapy offers a gentle, effective way to reconnect with calm and safety. If you're a parent feeling stuck, unheard, or unsupported, please know there is help out there. Reach out to explore whether specialist hypnotherapy could be the gentle, effective support your child needs right now. You can contact me, Amy, at Magic Minds Family Hypnotherapy via www.magicmindshypnotherapy.com or email me directly at amy@magicmindshypnotherapy.co.uk. Most of my work is online, which suits many of the children I support—those who are anxious, burned out, or who simply need the comfort of their own home environment to feel safe enough to engage.
There is hope. There are options. But we must start listening to families. We must stop dismissing children’s pain just because they see and experience the world differently.
Neurodivergent children deserve better.
